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And whatever it is, it’s amazing.’ ‘Do their motivations make sense to you?’ I asked. He didn’t often seemed stumped by a question, but this time I thought he might be. After a pregnant half minute or so, though, he responded. ‘That’s hard to answer. I only know what it’s like to be me. Do my motivations make sense? I don’t know. ‘I might, at least to some extent, understand my own motivations. Theirs? I’m not sure. There are things they all say. They talk about service. What’s at the root of that, though? ‘I’m not sure I need to understand. What I do understand is people are complicated. And there are all kinds of different, conflicting motivations people have with regards to all sorts of things. ‘But as long as it’s all consensual and no one’s getting seriously hurt or traumatized, I think it’s OK.’ Often the word ‘consensual’ might be phrased something more like, ‘consenting adults,’ but I noticed he didn’t include the word ‘adult’ in that sentence. I didn’t revive that. He gasped and moaned. I noticed a little dribble at his mouth. I knew I could make him come if I wanted him to. But I didn't. I leaned forward and put my lips against his and kissed him, my tongue between his lips, our tongues touching.When we moved apart, he said, in a soft voice, "Have you always been gay?"Yes," I said. "Ever since I can remember, I thought about being girly with a boy. I had a friend with whom I used to play. He was bigger than me, and used to put me on his lap and touch me. I loved it. Later, when I was away being a counselor at a camp, another counselor used to play with me at night. I loved that too, sucking his cock, being naked in his bed."Becky was stroking my back and shoulders as I talked. I ran my hands along her thighs. We were both erect, even without directly touching our cocks."But I'm really bi, more than gay," I said. "Because I always loved girls too, not just their clothes, but them. So I always had friends who were girls, and I dated too. I never.
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