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I wished there was something I could do."Josh Holliday, everyone," I said softly into my microphone. I turned toJosh, who was bowing to the crowd. Once he was finished he looked overat me, and I knew that he had been crying too. I almost lost mycomposure immediately, and I took a step toward him.But being near me seemed to be the last thing Josh wanted. "Thank you,"he told the crowd quietly before turning and walking off the stage. Iwatched silently for a few moments, trying to compose myself. I stillhad to continue the concert, and bursting into tears would not help meaccomplish that goal.Eventually, I was able to steel myself against the emotions that wereswirling around within me and turned back to the crowd.The show had to go on.---I sighed once more before stepping off my bus. I didn't want to do this.I understood now why Josh had never come to my dressing room after ourconcert at the Staples Center. But I also knew that I wasn't going to dothat to Josh. I had been in agony that. " Think you're funny, little wiseass?" said Billy.He grabbed me by my collar and pulled me down an alley by the store. I prayed his girlfriend would talk some sense into him. She didn’t. Billy punched me in the stomach and pushed me against a Dumpster. "Get out of my sight," he said. "Or I'll ring your scrawny little neck. You dork!"Billy walked on with his girlfriend. She acted like nothing had happened. Billy Mills, big junior class cretin, thinks he's tough shit.Dazed I started to walk home. I had been upbeat all day; now I was just plain beat up. But after getting roughed up by Billy I felt like a sniveling weakling; instead of femme I felt like an effeminate weakling.I even thought about canceling Karen's lesson. It was Tuesday, and tonight Frankie's cousin Karen would give me a femme tutorial. But when eight o'clock came, I went.I told Karen what had happened."Oh hon. Being a sweet thing like you sure has its downside. Are you all right?" I said nothing, just fumed."I got an.
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