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Like a man’s sex, unrolled and grown out of its nest? The opened drapes allowed the moon’s light to fill the room with soft luster but cast mysterious shadows, mysteries holding joys unknown. Duncan lay quietly on the hide-a-bed in a shaft of moonlight. Standing looking down at him she felt warmth for him sliding through her again. He looked so strong, so masculine, so good there on her couch. What her ambivalence must be doing to him! She felt how inadequate she was! The man she had loved, who she had given herself to unconditionally, had found her less than adequate. All the signs pointed to his abandoning her. Helen had always been confident in her sexuality. She had always been sure, confident in her beauty, strong in being a woman. Now she felt empty, wondering if she was adequate. Her husband had discovered after years together that she was not woman enough for him. She felt herself shrivel inside, wondering how she could expect any man to find her attractive. But the. When I hung up the phone I felt a little guilty for not trusting my wife, but my guts were telling me there was something going on and I had always been one to follow my instincts, they'd seldom let me down in the past and I didn't think they were wrong now. Pouring myself a stiff drink I sat and brooded about what had gone wrong in my marriage of ten years standing, I suppose it had all gone wrong when Claire had miscarried three years back, thinking back on it I should have guessed something was wrong even then for later tests had shown that I was totally sterile, the equipment worked, but I was firing blanks. This made me wonder how many other lovers Claire had been with since we had got married, by the time I went up to bed I was feeling more depressed than angry and to find that Claire had locked the bedroom door was the last straw. I decided that if it was proved that she was having an affair with Gordon I would divorce her, the way the laws were now I would not lose much once.
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