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That pretty much summed up how I ended up back in mum's house after a 20 year absence. At the grand age of 38, my life had well and truly come off the rails and I was feeling fairly sorry for myself. Mum had been just great. She was supportive when my marriage hit difficulties. Being non-judgmental and offering to help in anyway she could. She even suggested a councillor that she knew who could possibly help. Looking back on it, I could see so clearly that I was mainly to blame. It was no coincidence that my business and marriage declined at roughly the same time. The more I neglected one, the more the other suffered. To the extent, that in my feeble attempts to gain both, I lost both. My wife and I had been childhood sweethearts. You know, I can't even remember asking her to marry me, it was just sort of assumed we would end up together, both families got on well, and we sort of just fell into it.It wasn't that I didn't love her, but it was a quiet, unassuming love, not the blinding. “Cocked Pistol” indeed! (That’s what the Armed Forces call operations under DEFCON 1 conditions)With Faye’s lack of remorse, consideration of whether to work on the marriage hadn’t even been a speed bump on the road to going full nuclear. Heck, it wasn’t even a painted line on that road. I never bothered debating with myself about what I needed to do.The ability to analyze problems on the fly and find solutions quickly was one of my most valuable talents in the firm where I worked. Where others wanted to study an issue to death, hold meetings, and deliberate FOREVER on possible outcomes of any proposed action, I made decisions and implemented them. The vast majority of the time, what I decided to do, worked. Sometimes, what I did wasn’t the absolute optimal solution when viewed in hindsight, but whatever I decided was always better than dithering around for a lengthy period. It invariably saved the company time and money that would have been wasted trying to find the best possible.
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