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Firstly it's an adult story written by and for adult types. Secondly believeit or not it's fiction and so is the cast of characters. Any similarities toreal folk living or dead are just coincidental, honest. The only similaritybetwixt Lien Venrihet and Lord Vetinari is due to the resemblance of variousforeign phonetics. Mr. Pratchett's character obviously has too much characterto appear in this story and is much cleverer than Lien in any event. Pleasebe aware this story is both bloody and extreme, containing torture, snuff,and the occasional mundane murder with some mutilation thrown in at times.You've been warned so if you still want to, enjoy. Mad Lews Lien the Fifth I Ascension Once upon a time, though not nearly as long ago as you might think, Therewas a kingdom on the island we now call Keltoi, which lies off the northerncoast of Galatae. Back in those days the kingdom was briefly ruled by a youngmonarch named Lien Venrihet the fifth. No pictures survive of this audaciousyoung. I made sure she understood that she was welcome and 'not barging in' on anything. I could see that she was nervous."Look, Connie. It's just us degenerates. I can see that your thinking about elephants, but it's no big deal. Relax, would ya?" I told her while I was parking the van.We ran up the steps and into the house, getting pretty wet in the dash. Nancy got her a dry t shirt and I poured her some coffee and stuck a shot of brandy in it. I gave it to her and went to put on a dry shirt of my own.While I was gone, Nancy lit up a joint and handed it to her. "Hear you'rr stuck on my invitation." Connie choked a bit and coughed. Nancy gave her a sympathetic look and told her to relax. "Taint no big thang."The Cat could smell the good bud burning in the kitchen and followed her nose out. "What isn't any big thing?" Her Christmas present." Oh." The Cat took a suck and held it in. Connie must have thought she was off the hook. Kept thinking of the Cat as sixteen and Nancy as a.
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