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....well unless I promise her something.” He was bright red again and I can only imagine what she was trying to get him to do. He pointed a finger at Sarah. “You’re the one who got her so worked up; you should be the one to get her out of there. If I go back in there she’ll just get upset and start yelling obscenities again. I’m going back to the room. Could you please just get her back to our room?” “What room are you in Philip?” I couldn’t help but feel at least a little responsible for Philip's distress. I wanted to see if I could help a guy out. We walked into the bar lounge area. There were a few people there but it was far from packed. There was a band playing badly in the corner and they were playing lounge music that hadn’t seen the light of day since some time in the sixties. The barman looked as disinterested as you can get while still having a pulse and the whole atmosphere of the place reeked of desperation. For such a classy motel, I was stunned to see the bar in this. For me, testosterone is apoison that has warped my judgment and blinded me so that I have notbeen able to see my true identity. Please collar me, leash me, make me yours. Cure me, Daddy, once and forall, of this terrible disease. I am too weak to do it alone. Iunderstand that now. Help me, Daddy, to become the sissy that I wasalways meant to be.Step FourIt takes real courage to look at yourself and your life with completehonesty. Can you find the courage do that, sissy? Can you review yourpast behavior without rationalizations and excuses, without throwing theblame for your own shortcomings as a man onto others?This is an essential step in the healing process.It is not enough simply to admit that there is a problem; you mustaccept the fact that you are the problem. Being a sissy isn't easy.Being a sissy takes balls! It takes the balls to accept the fact thatyou should never have been born with balls in the first place, that allyour attempts to "man up" were doomed to failure from.
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