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“Good. If we have less time, we’ll need to make it more intense.” “But… but like this?” My skin burned. Her nails softly trailed over my pubes, and it felt incredibly embarrassing… and nice. I closed my eyes. This couldn’t feel nice! But then her hand left, if only for a short moment, then it was back with a loud slap, and my world rocked. She didn’t wait between swats either. Like summer rain, they poured down on my poor bum in a torrent, cracking loud and shooting heat through my backside in waves. “Owwww!” I whimpered, and at about the tenth swat, my cheeks were wet and my eyes blurry. She didn’t let up. On and on the swats fell, shook me, made spots of pain explode on my bum. My body rocked forward and backward in a fast rhythm, and suddenly I was intensely aware that my breasts were still pressing down on her thigh, and every rocking motion made them rub against them. I felt my nipples grow hard, and the heat spread from my bum down between my thighs. “Noooo,” I whimpered. He thanked the Lord for this very loving woman and said, ‘Lord, they’re finally together.’One mourner leaned over and quietly asked her friend, ‘Do you think he means her first, second or third husband? ‘ The friend replied, ‘ I think he means her legs.”There was this man who went to the hospital every Monday morning, and every Monday he would see the same Blond woman on the elevator. One Monday he decided to strike up a conversation with the young blond and asks “So why are you here every Monday?” to which she replies “I go to the third floor to give blood. They pay me $10.00, What about you?”He says “I go to the fifth floor to donate sperm, they pay me $100.00”The next Monday they both get on the elevator and he asks “third floor? “and she shakes her head no keeping her lips tightly closed and presses the #5 button.A drunken farmer comes home late one night holding a sheep under his arm. He walks into the bedroom and says “This is the pig I’ve been f@#king!”His wife says “You.
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