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Watching has to be OK, right? We can just pretend that she caught me. I ask if she is finished and she says no, she is a slow reader, but I know better. She is probably re-reading it for the second, or third time to make sure it says what she thinks it said. Oh boy ... tick tock. Finally she finishes. And says nothing for a moment and then says at this point it needs to be an open invitation. OK. That is better than a no. Then she starts asking some questions, and stammering a bit and I try to answer. I don’t even remember what the questions were at this point. This would have been so much easier if she would have just said yes and I could have gotten on with it! LOL! Right.We finish the wine and the discussion and she decides she needs to get going.HerAs I walk out to my car I am trying to keep composed. I cannot believe he asked me that. Part of me really really wants to, but I am afraid it will impact our relationship in a negative light. And is it only once, or more, or what if I. "Oh my God, that's screwed up! How can a church, that's supposed to beall about God so loved the world, be like that?!?" He exclaimed, andwrapped his arm around my shoulders giving me a slight squeeze as wewalked. "I know it doesn't help much, but I'm so sorry they made you feelthat way. It pisses me off" Hey, it does help and I appreciate it. Trust me though, I don't feellike that anymore," I tell him as I gave his arm a squeeze."I keep trying to put myself in your position, you know. I'm trying tounderstand just a tiny bit about how you felt, and frankly I can't wrapmy head around it. I mean were you happy, umm you know, before you foundout you were... Different?" he asked."I think I was... Back then though I was just a young kid, gender wasn'treally a deal for me then. Jen was already my closest friend and she wasthe biggest tomboy you would have ever seen back then. We were justfriends and there wasn't any pressure to be anything other than a kid,you know? Then once the changes.
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