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There can be no more than one hand or foot on any dot. If your hand or foot is already on a dot of the called color, you must move it to another dot of that color. If there’s no way to get your left hand to a yellow dot but to reach between your opponent’s legs, say, “Hope you don’t mind,” and he’ll act stone-faced as you rub against what’s there.Never remove your hand or foot from a dot, other than lifting it to allow another hand or foot to pass.The objective: “To outlast opponents by stretching and entwining your body like a human pretzel around a large vinyl sheet emblazoned with multicolored dots, without falling down.”The real objective, of course, is to have sex on the mat.Strategy? Move toward your opponent’s portion of the mat to force him to go over or under you. Over or under? We know what we like, but if you haven’t played with him before, maybe it’s best to settle for the bottom.Tactics?Goose him for a quick collapse. The official rules don’t prohibit it. If he doesn’t. We lost "Mishy" first, Corporal Miscjeweriwitz, but this was earlier, when we were fighting our usual rear guard action. We were moving to the West, fighting just enough to slow them down before booby trapping the area and moving away from them. We were heading the way we wanted, and keeping the Sa'arm far enough back that we were in no danger of having them overwhelm us with their superior numbers. Textbook hit and run action, Sir. Private Gillespie got hit later in the day, several hours after the Corporal, sir. I wouldn't say we got outflanked either sir, more like we turned in one direction and happened onto a whole new bunch of 'dickheads' who were probably out there searching through the strewn wreckage of that Panther that got knocked down. Rather than try to engage them sir, we turned around and headed in a more Southeasterly direction, trying to go around them if we could. When Private Gillespie got hit, it was a few minutes after we'd started heading off in that.
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