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Being her little fifteen-year-old brother makes me the scum of the Earth in her eyes. I am not even good enough to speak too.When Kimberly got a nineteen-year-old boyfriend she got even worse. She became the envy of her girlfriends because she was dating one of the football players. (American football that is.) That put her in an even higher category at school.Over the next couple of months I noticed some unusual changes in her that Mom and Dad did not seem to notice. She studied less and talked less on the phone to her friends. Her girlfriends stopped coming by to visit her too. She started dressing sexier and she stopped wearing panties. I noticed that right away because every night I waited to jerk off in her used panties and was constantly disappointed. Then her circle of friends changed. She started going to parties and coming home smelling of cigarettes and booze, her hair was messed up, and at times her clothes were in disarray.When I tried to say something to her she just. I’m not cut out for much. I’m trying to be someone I can’t be. I can’t concentrate, and I’ve been sleeping so much.”“Why not start by taking a shower?”“And then?”“We’ll talk about it. What else can I say? You’ve got to take a shower sometime. You haven’t said prayers for a while. So start with a shower, and then we will overcome the next obstacle, okay?”“I don’t want to move unless it’s all laid out plain, and until that time comes, I’ll just lie here and daydream about it.”“You won’t get very far. By the time you think it out, you’ll be dead.”“One starts with his dreams. When you lose that, then your faith will be next. After that, you lie in bed and ponder how to get out of bed. What am I going to do? I don’t feel like getting up. I don’t feel like talking. It’s impossible to be anything in this place, to get married, to be a holy man. What’s so glorious about becoming a wise man of Islam? Is it nobility in being totally anonymous? It’s a prison. I’ve tried. I’ve done my best. I.
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