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Now Iknow he doesn’t turn you on, and I know you feel weird about it, but the fact of the matter is he’llbe there for you when the girls let you down. If you want him to be good to you, you’ve got to begood to him, and that means letting him have it some of the time.”Mike’s frown turned into an awkward grimace. “I dunno. He’s my friend, and I don’t want to justuse him like some kind of jack-off toy. Besides, wouldn’t that just make things awkward whenwe’re hanging out normally?”“It’s only as awkward as you or he makes it.” Andrew looked right and left and lowered hisvoice. “Your brother and I had this buddy Chad a few years ago. We were friendly with him, lethim see us change clothes in front of him, and every once in a while we let him blow us. Thenthat bitch Kristina played your brother to make her ex jealous and tried to pass it off as nothing.He used Chad’s mouth for a solid week so he wouldn’t be tempted to hook up with her again.”Mike’s eyes widened - he hadn’t heard that part. I’m not sure I can live up to that. That’s why I have to go away. You deserve so much more than a girl who’s still a scared child half the time and a grieving widow the rest. To my surprise, I really am grieving. I wasn’t in love with Stan, but he was nice to me most of the time. I’ll contact my lawyer with details of where to find me if necessary. He’ll also know that he’s to follow your orders and help you any way he can, but he’s not to tell you where I am. I’m no good to anyone right now, least of all you.I know you’ll be upset about this and I wish I hadn’t hurt you. I know how much you’ve been hurt in the past. Don’t wait for me. I don’t know when or even IF I’ll be back. I have to work on me before I can stand beside you. I hope that someday we’ll meet again and that what we felt in that first kiss is still there. If you’ve moved on, then I’ll know that you’re happy and I’ll be relieved that I didn’t hurt you too badly.All my love,MelodyI stared at the page, not understanding..
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