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Even to the point of questioning whether they were in factdecisions at all, or whether I'd simply allowed myself to be carriedalong by some kind of thoughtless momentum, one step leading inevitablyto the next, and to the next, without stopping to consider their validityor rightness. It was a hellish week, believe me.In my previous article on my breast augmentation surgery, I referred tothe sudden fear and uncertainty I felt when confronted with the imminenceof the surgery itself, and how I wondered, "What the fuck am I doing??Why am I doing this?" Well, what I experienced this time was the samething, only magnified a thousand times. It was pretty scary.But, with the help of my friends, my wonderful partner, my music, and myexcellent therapist, I have once again found the ground beneath my feet,and I am once again aware of what, really, I always knew, but forgotbriefly. And that is this: I am a woman. I may have been assigned "male"at birth, and yes, I had all of the male bits and. So a person called me from the seat adjacent to the door. He was a bit old, around 45 to 50 years of old. He was in traditional white dhoti and shirt.I sat beside him because there was no other seat available in men’s side. The conductor came to us. We took our respective tickets. It assured me to know that he is going to get down before me.He initiated a conversation. He just introduced himself and asked about me. I introduced myself. I always have my bag with me and it was on my lap when we are talking. We talked generally for a while and I felt there is wrong nothing to talk.So I rested on the back of a seat before me. The bus was not that crowded. The breeze was flowing well due to the door on my left side but not from my right. The man was fat and he just covered the whole window. I tried to sleep but I couldn’t.So I kept my eyes closed and rested on the seat before me. He was looking out of the window for a while. After a few minutes, he just kept his left hand on my knees and.
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