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“A married friend, her husband, two kids, and grandmother.”“Good. That kind of self-medication would be disastrous at the moment.”“I have no desire. I told my wives yesterday that the whole thing was getting old and I just couldn’t go on the way I was.”“And that’s when you started your freefall?”I nodded, “Yes.”“Well, let’s start with this encounter. Or do you need to start before then?”“Before. Long before. February of ‘89, according to my journal. I had a conversation with my friend Jorge, God rest his soul, about the exact thing. Let me read it to you. I used to turn to this guy for very serious help with problems, to the point where I called him ‘Lucy’ when he asked for 5¢ at the end of the conversation I’m going to read to you. He actually helped a lot more than some professionals.”“So you let, in effect, an amateur psychologist treat you?”“Even I’m not that dumb, though ‘Lucy’ might say I was worse, but he was a very good friend who had very good insight into my thinking. This. I had to go back-to-back cause of a car accident, and then a gang shooting. Cops are still at the hospital over that one. It is like a war zone. I fix up one person and shortly after another comes through the door. I get a little sleep and then it all begins again the next day. Sometimes I wish for a boring day. Nothing happens. Just some stupid k** sticking Lego up his nose.”Nik listened to Rai intently, driving towards the diner. He didn’t ask any questions or make any comments. He just sat and listened.“I’m just a mess right now for our date. Look at me. I look like a dirty peasant, someone common. I must look like a street urchin. I timed everything perfectly and then another fucking hoodrat gets himself shot in some stupid gang war, and has to wind up on my emergency table. I really need a drink. If I keep talking like this, I’m going to ruin the entire evening.”Rai immediately went silent, unbuckling her seatbelt and leaning over onto Nik’s lap. No foreplay or rubbing, she just.
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