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I get a sudden flash of inspiration, and reach for my pad and pen.I've been scratching out this particular poem for a while now; it's not coming very easily. Writing about my self-harm always seems to be much more of an effort than writing about my transsexuality, or my depression. It's difficult to get the words out, and there are special skills involved in the process.For instance: it is vital that you DO NOT read what you have written straight after you have written it. Since writing about it requires me to be depressed in the first place, I've found that if I re-read the thing I get even more depressed and have to do something horrible to myself. Usually cutting, biting or burning; although I've been punching bits until they go numb lately (slightly strange; you'd think I could just walk into the street and say "Hi" to save myself the effort, but it's... different when I do it). The disadvantage is that you walk around with a limp, or you can't use both bits of cutlery, or. Ummm, can I see your chest? Maybe I can give you something to help withthe pain," Ashley asked hoping to see what the heck was up with hischest.Jessie never did like Ashley. She was part of the "popular" crowd and hewas more of the outcast troublemaker. She did seem genuinely concernedthough and he thought that another opinion of what was going on with hischest couldn't hurt."Ok Ashley, but you have to promise not to pinch or hit or do anythingelse to me ok?" Ok Jessie...I promise."Jessie lifted his shirt and took it off exposing his pink camisole top asAshley's jaw dropped."What are you wearing Jessie??? Where did you get that???" she asked in asurprised tone."My mom gave me this top to wear until my swelling goes down. It helpswith my sensitivity. Why?" Jessie pondered her odd question.Ashley quickly came to the realization that something odd was definitelyup. Look at him. He's standing there wearing a top that she probably hadin her underwear drawer and he was completely oblivious..
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