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Like I'm crumbling.I pull back, breaking free of her and I back away, my hands up defensively. My breath is uneven, and I feel this turmoil in me. Because I want to kiss her again."Why? Why can't you... tell me?"She sighs, crossing to her bed and sitting on it, drawing her legs up under her. I sit gingerly on the edge of the bed. I can't be too close to her."You're my best friend Sam."I snort. "Am I?"She looks up, her eyes wide. And she looks scared. "Yes. You are." She says the words slowly and deliberately.And I feel my gut churn as I realise something. "Are you... are you doing this because I said I loved you? Because you think this is what I want?"A wave of frustration sweeps through me, and most of it's directed at myself. I feel myself working up into a frenzy."What, you have to put yourself up to this? To- to kissing me at night because you can't stand it during the day? Do you think this is what you have to do to keep me? To keep from losing me? This isn't what I want. I. It was a photo of Jessica Simpson, looking remarkably slutty and stupid in cut-off jeans and a cheap shirt.?I don’t know, mistress,? said Maria, ?You always look so special. Are you sure that you really want to look like that???It is not a look for me, you idiot,? said Erika, not unkindly, ?It is a look for you, I think.?Maria was so overcome with gratitude to her mistress for taking this interest in her appearance that she whimpered with pleasure.?Please,? she said, ?Your slut wants to look like that if that will please you.?Later that morning, Erika allowed Maria to make herself come while watching a music video of Jessica Simpson, telling her that it was important to try and model her appearance on that of the airhead actress.That afternoon, Erika took Maria shopping. Erika told Maria that it would not be right to waste much money on her, so they went to cheap shops used mainly by teenagers. Maria cringed in embarrassment in these places. She was 32, and all the other customers.
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