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Touched one with the tip of my pinky finger...”St. Peter says “Alright Sister, now dip the tip of your pinky finger in the Holy Water, and you may be admitted.” and she did so.St. Peter now turns to the second nun and says “Sister, have you ever touched a penis?”“Well ... There was this one time ... that I held one for a moment...”“Alright Sister, now just wash your hands in the Holy Water, and you may be admitted” and she does so.Now at this, there is a noise, a jostling in the line. It seems that one nun is trying to cut in front of another!St. Peter sees this and asks the Nun “Sister Susan, what is this? There is no rush!”Sister Susan responds “Well if I’m going to have to gargle this stuff, I’d rather do it before Sister Mary sticks her ass in it!”This one is compliments of Joe SAfter a tiring day, a commuter settled down in his seat and closed his eyes.As the train rolled out of the station, the young woman sitting next to him pulled out her cell phone and started talking in a. . I can’t make up to you what I didn’t do in the past. I was a coward then.”“You were a thief, Glover. You stole the heart of a country girl, stole the family she hoped to have, stole my future with that family, stole ... aw, fuck. Look, you say that Delvin didn’t know?”“No. It’s ... I had finally gotten a big score, decided to retire, decided that I was tired of being a thief and would be a simple farmer. From what I was told, I showed up at the farm about two weeks too late. The farm was burned to the ground. Everyone was dead or gone. I ... thought you were dead, too. Then when Brynjolf recruited you ... I was a coward again. I wanted to tell you then, but ... I ran. Here. Far from the truth.”Sapphire smiled a grim smile. “I know. I saw the letter you never sent. I’m a damn good thief. Look, what I’ve seen with the Queen? I can’t forgive you for what you did, but I can guess that it wasn’t all your fault. I’m not saying that our pig farm was all that important. Doesn’t mean that.
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