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Mom treats me like a baby. Just like you do." Then stop acting like a baby. You want everything your way, don't you?" Oh my God, just listen to yourself! Heather, what did I just tell you? You already get everything your way! I want the same thing here that I want at the house. I want it to be my turn for a change. Why is that so bad?"Heather paused for a moment, dropping her gaze. "All right, I understand," she said in clipped tones. "But don't do it this way, okay? Let me talk to Mom. Maybe I can get her to..."Melinda sneered. "Oh, yeah, sure, how generous of you. Then I'll owe you another favor. Nice try." Melinda, I didn't mean that!" And maybe I don't need you to do it anyway, since I can just get things from her myself now!"Heather stared at her little sister. "You can't do that, Mel! You..." Shut up, Heather! Just shut up! No more! Don't tell me what I can't do. I'm tired of it. I'm tired of just being your 'baby sister'. I'm tired of you getting all the attention. I'm tired. I'm sure, between them, they will find the only Easter slasher movie ever made.My date and current lover is Katrina Waves, a super friendly, blond, leggy nurse who was very excited to meet my family. I've tried to warn her, telling her they are the inspiration for the infamous Manson family, although the Manson clan had better table manners. One problem I anticipate is the meal itself. Hogs devouring their last meal before entering the slaughterhouse are less noisy than my gluttonous fam. Also, since she's a nurse, she prizes nutrition. Hell, she even uses words like "antioxidants." Seriously, who is anti oxygen?I was nervous about asking her home to meet them. Some timid girls are jumpy about going to the site of a chainsaw massacre and sequels, but she jumped at the opportunity (hurting my neck in the process since I was feasting between her legs at the time. Can you say "whiplash," boys and girls?) Her first question as she attached a neck brace to me: What kind of tofu will she.
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