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" Mils looked horrified. I laughed. She made a face at me and stuck her tongue out at me. At least, she'd kept her sense of humor. If she knew how close to the truth my statement had been, she might not have thought our conversation so humorous.I carefully and tightly wrapped the sweatpants and sweatshirt around her leg and anchored them with duct tape. I elicited a couple of yelps from her as I straightened the leg. I hated to do that part, but I knew I had to. I took the panels I'd cut from the sides of her suitcase, and made a long box with no ends for her leg from the stiff material.Mils watched me. She observed, "Hey, I have a suitcase with sides just like that ... Oh, shit." I looked at her and nodded, confirming her guess about the demise of her suitcase.Before she could comment further, I said, "Sorry, I couldn't find any other suitable material for a splint on such short notice. I'll buy you a new one."With more duct tape I wrapped the splints around her leg until I'd made. I showered again and got dressed, deciding that hopefully I wouldn’t need underwear. Khaki pants, blue sport shirt and a brown sport coat completed my ensemble. Earlier that afternoon I had purchased a bottle of my favorite Merlot to give as a hostess gift. I was ready to go, but first I needed something to make sure the evening went right. “Yeah,” I said aloud with no one around to hear me. I went to the cupboard and removed my bottle of Viagra. Now I want you to understand that I don’t really need it, but I am 63 and well, you know sometimes a man needs a little help. So I took two, risking permanent injury and hoping for an erection lasting more than four hours. My last task before heading next door was to roll a big fat doobie. I didn’t know if either one of them ever got high but like a good Boy Scout, I thought “Be Prepared.” I slipped the joint into a cigar sleeve and tucked it into my jacket pocket. Retrieving the beans from the fridge and the wine from the table I.
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