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” He paused, like he was makin’ sure I was payin’ attention, and he leaned in a little and said, “But the best way to treat a lady’s pussy right is to get up close and personal with it, give it a little kissin’, and bit o’ lickin’.” “Lickin’?” I said, “How can y’all go lickin’ down there where she pees?”Uncle Abe said, “That’s the strangeness of it boy. I know it don’t sound right putting your tongue down there, but a lady’s pussy is the sweetest thing y’all are ever gonna taste, and once you smelt one, you ain’t never gonna be the same again.” I figured for moment Uncle Abe was only joshin’ about lickin’ down there on a lady’s special place, but he said, “I ain’t jokin’, Wendell. You just wait and see.” So after Uncle Abe was all finished learnin’ me all about peckers and ladies, he said, “Now, Wendell, I want y’all to remember that there ain’t no reason to be ashamed of yer pecker going all hard and swoll up like that. It means you’ve growed into a man, and you should be proud of. Feelings aren’t wrong. Feelings are never wrong. Feelings always tell the truth, and it’s okay for you to feel how you feel. I’m not judging you. You’re brave for telling me this. Thank you for telling me this.Not judging her. A powerful, lovely, kind, understanding, wise black woman was not judging her for admitting that being ****d by a black man (his big lips those long fingers that scratchy, woolly hair that HUGE THICK IT HURT ME HURT ME DEEP GET OFF ME YOU FUCKING HORRIBLE DIRTY NIG—)—made it all much, much worse.It’s not you, Georgetta had said. It’s not your fault those thoughts, those feelings, are inside of you. You’ve been given those messages since you were born. Those messages were placed in you, installed in you, without your consent. It’s a script, a script of modern America. A script of programming, of automatic thoughts, of thoughts that think us instead of us thinking them. It’s not your fault, those thoughts.Laurie had said, They’re not? But I’m thinking.
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