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And I realised that there was more to Nancy – like much more to Nancy – than the cool, graceful, polished surface that she showed in school. And I felt, like, sort of obscurely honoured to be hearing all this stuff, as if this was a much more profound intimacy than having sex in my bed. Which I guess it was. And I felt warm and protective and sort of oddly strong, as if all the pain in my life had sort of trained me up and prepared me to carry hers. I heard about her mother being drunk insensible most nights, but hey, that was OK because nobody knew, and sometimes her father hit her mother, but that was OK too because nobody knew, and how Dan was OK and approved as her boyfriend because he was a jock and went to the same church and his father was in the same clubs and because he was in the same viginity pledge thing that she’d had to sign up to when she was like twelve but also like and perhaps this most of all because he was rich and like the money was old money and how her father. I waited till the time my son goes to bed.‘Baby, can I talk to you before you go to bed?’ I called him to the couch. As he was sitting down, I noticed him looked at my cleavage, I purposefully left open for him to see.‘What is it mom?’ He barely made eye contact with me. He couldn’t take his eyes off from my cleavage. I felt good about the decision I took to leave my cleavage open.‘Honey there is no easy way for me to say this. This may sound weird to you. But bear with me till I finish ok?’ As I was saying I could see my son’s facial expression change.‘okey.’ He said, almost quietly.‘Honey, I never told you about this. I had these strong sexual feelings for you since I can remember. But since you turned 18, I can’t keep them bottled inside me. I can’t even sleep at night. At nights, all I do is masturbate listening to you, breath in your sleep. I even find it hard to look you in the eye because of the ways I imagined you making love to me. Hell, I wish you would take me right here.
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