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Naturally, everyone noticed my naked feet in the flip-flops, especially since Daddy Sir had me start to paint my toenails. Not that this was the most bizarre aspect of my appearance for by now Daddy Sir had me make various other alterations to my attire that he deemed appropriate for my new status in life. He had me cut my slacks so they hung well above my ankles, cut away the back pockets and sew up the front ones, leaving me no place to carry anything. I had to put all my possessions in a cheap tote made of orange plastic. He had me remove all the buttons from my shirt so to close it I had to tie up the ends as if it were a girl’s halter. My tie, a Father’s Day gift from my kids I recalled with a pang, became a kind of scarf, and, on casual days, a headband. To make matters worse, by now I had already been forbidden to wipe myself and I wasn’t often given permission to wash my clothes or body so I had begun to smell pretty bad. Even people on the train begun to make faces of. The body turns to me and I feel an arm over my chest and a warm body creeps close to me. As a protective wing I put my arm over her and stroking her back repeatedly until she stops talking, so the silence returns in the bedroom.Her arm across my chest feels warm and I follow with a finger the vertical and horizontal scars on her wrists. Fading wounds of an earlier life, an unhappy life. Although these physical scars fade some wounds remain open. Even if she seek professional help, it takes time until these wounds have a place in her life and she has regained her self-confidence and faith in the rest of the world.I love to touch her naked body when I see her in the shower but I'm worried about her when I see her scrubbing her body furiously because she thinks she is dirty. She knows that I enjoy when she is lying beside me on the sofa, feeling her warm body and smell her scent but I grieve with her when she spontaneously bursts into tears over an old sore memory. She knows I have fun.
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