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The day was warmand the stream was full so I stripped off my clothes and went skinnydipping as we sometimes did on scout campouts. The road in those days wasnarrow and bumpy and not high enough for passing cars to see down to thewater's edge. But it was not so low for a passing box truck, the driver ofwhich spotted me knee deep in the stream, my skinny butt exposed to view.He honked his horn in appreciation as he drove out of sight.I decided to give up on fishing and the water wasn't all that warm forswimming, my immature cock shriveling even smaller in the cool air.Stashing my fishing gear and my bike in some bushes, I dressed and set offexploring the trails. You never knew what you might find, a bird's nest, ora snakeskin. Once I found a snakeskin of a different sort. I had spied ontwo teenage couples having sex in a car. When they were gone I picked upthe loaded condom one teen had discarded and used it to jerk myself off,imagining what it must feel like to fuck a girl. At that. Anyway I ignored all the signs being overly sensitive for a boy It should of clicked when I was diagnosed with disphoria. I knew I liked being girly but I really thought all teen age boys were like me. Always being a pretty-boy girls always came my way but they all end the same I get hurt because just like a girl I lack self esteem and I'm not controlling enough. Also I lack the testosterone to compete with other Men and now that older and I realized that I'm terrified of women. And eventhough Ive had some gay experiments I thought I was straight Men were not that attractive too me, until I was incarcerated for a couple of months and I saw this beautiful young Latin guy taking a shower I guess I never saw a Man totally naked his skin was so dark and smooth his butt was perfect I trembled and came without even touching myself. Needless to Say I tried to see everytimoe he was naked as well as half dozen hot Men in there. After that I wanted a Man not a blow job but I want love to.
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