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The first two times I went to the kitchen and put my finger in ice water to keep the swelling down. About half an hour later, I was ready for work again. What I did this time was, I pulled up at a steeper angle, rather than straight out, It's too bad my brain didn't send a signal to my foot a nano-second sooner saying "Take your foot off the pedal, you dumbass!!" So as I'm standing there cursing to myself, my second thought is "OK, better get this thing in some ice" WARNING: The following scene may be too intense for some viewers. Parental discretion is advised. Or you could just close your eyes and have some one read it to you. Your call. As I pulled my finger out from under my armpit to look at it, expecting it to start turning that wonderful purple color, instead, I was truly horrified to see a shredded mass of flesh and blood, and I distinctly remember seeing a spot of white and thinking "Ahh it's not so bad I still have my finger nail." Not. If you jump to conclusions, you should do so with all due deliberation. Then you kill the son of a bitch.Hell, I can tell you me and Homer went way back together. I mean, I even stayed and took the fourth grade over for the second time so I wouldn't leave him behind. This is how deep my side of the friendship goes. I probably could have had already passed the third grade on my second try at it but I waited for old Homer. Some people just have no sense of gratitude.I got to admit it, though. I surely did like lording it over the dumb little kids who was taking it for the first time and I already knew all the answers. Well, some of 'em, anyways. It felt good to know something when the other guy doesn't, even if they was just little kids. Ever little bit helps, as they say in one of those country western songs that all America sings with a joyous heart. (Have you ever thought where this old world would be without country and western music?)Of course our teacher was some pissed at me.
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